The Power of Eye Gazing: How it can help us to create a better connection with each other
It is thought by many that the eyes are the windows to the soul and that by looking into someone’s eyes you are able to see their true self. Now for anyone who has experienced the incredible power of eye gazing, this is indeed true as it undoubtedly creates a great feeling of love and oneness with the person you are eye gazing with.
The first time I experienced eye gazing I was at a women’s gathering where eye gazing was one of our planned activities of the evening. I remember the feeling that struck me at the thought of having to hold another person’s gaze for an uncertain period of time. It was this feeling of awkwardness and fear as I was not used to looking into someone’s eyes without at least talking or smiling.
We quickly paired ourselves up and I found myself looking into the eyes of a woman who, unlike me, showed no feelings of discomfort or embarrassment. At first, I found the feeling of looking straight into someone’s eyes so unsettling and uncomfortable, this was not an activity I was used to and I didn’t know how to get around these awkward feelings. I was struggling to fight the urge to look away or smile but then I came to the realisation that the only way I could get around these feelings was to surrender to what was happening, take it seriously and enjoy it.
The feeling of needing to smile or look away then vanished and I found myself looking into, not only her eyes, but what felt like a deeper part of her being. I became unaware of all that was going on around us and just felt this intense connection with her and an energy exchange occurring between us. I felt overwhelmed by this beauty that I saw shining from her eyes and this love that I felt for her.
After experiencing what this practice has to offer, I feel that it is time that we reengage with this powerful practice and start looking into the eyes of our fellow humans. In today’s modern society and in particular large cities where people are huddled together in cramped public transport, there seems to be a great aversion to eye contact with many attempting to divert their eyes in public for fear of catching the eye of a stranger. As such, due to social conventions discouraging eye contact, we have lost touch with the power of looking into another human’s eyes and instead of perceiving it as something powerful, we perceive it as awkward and uncomfortable.
So why is it so special looking into someone’s eyes? Can we offer any scientific, logical answer or even spiritual answer to this question? I don’t think we can. Some spiritual teachers might argue that the reason we feel what we feel during eye gazing is because we are recognising the divine within the other person whilst others might argue that it is because we are recognising our shared humanity.
In my own opinion, I feel that eye gazing is one of those practices that is understood by the heart rather than the mind and one has to experience it to understand what is so special about it. I believe it best not to over analyse why we feel what we feel during this experience but appreciate it and perceive it in whatever way feels right to us and is enjoyable.
In my own experience, practicing eye gazing has been one of the most powerful things I have ever experienced as I found it can create a connection with another human being that I believe is different to any connection you could attain through verbal communication or physical contact.
What this experience showed me is that there is great value in practising eye gazing as it can help to create a better connection with our fellow humans. We currently live in a society where there is huge disconnection between all of us and a better connection with each other is desperately needed. It can also help us in cultivating better relationships with our loved ones whether they are family, friends or spouses (here is a useful article for practicing eye gazing with others). Right now I believe that we need to start practicing connecting with one another and I feel that eye gazing is one place we can start.